Category: Lulz


Random dribble

If, by some random weird quirk of fate, I ever become a stripper, my stripper name will be Chastity. This has been brought to you by “Going to see Magic Mike with my friend this morning”.

Advertisements

Mr Frothy Mix Of Fecal Matter And Lube That Is Sometimes The Byproduct Of Anal Sex (Aka Rick Santorum) has dropped out of the race? That just makes things seem so much better and brighter!

Or maybe it’s just because I’m realizing I only have a 4.5-5 hour shift tonight (depending on long closing keeps me). And that they’ve got no one between 5-6:30 for my position. And due to the fact that boyfriend has the car, I can’t go in. I mean, if it were just a matter of showing up, I’d suck it up, have taken the car, and dealt with it. But seeing as how you can’t clock in early without higher management approval (and they keep messing up the schedule like this…)

This post is now DIAMONDS

So..finals are done, huzzah! I sent in my last take home final at around 3:30 yesterday! My (second to last!) semester is over! Should be my last, but I digress, not going to get angry about things I cannot change…

During finals week, they have free food at the dining hall for students. Last night’s theme was pizza, pasta, and 80’s music.

Boyfriend and I were sitting at a table, minding our own business, reading the paper (yes, we are strange) and complaining that the pizza was even worse than usual (which is quite a feat….the normal pizza can pretty damn scary…) when all of a sudden, we hear clapping. I look up, and I see someone has jumped up on a table and was dancing. To 80’s music. It was like I had been plopped down in a movie! And the people working in the dining hall seemed just as surprised as we were to see people dancing on the table, so I’m pretty sure it was as spontaneous as it seemed….

Things quieted down for a while. Then a few minutes later, people were back on the table, but then there were more people dancing off the table, and people were singing. I had finished eating, and was ready to go anyways, so boyfriend and I left, sighing at the fact that our dining hall had become the set for an 80’s movie. We were torn between thinking it was awesome and amazing, and wtf-ing about the whole thing.

But, now I’m off to find a job. Yeah, that thing I still don’t have. Still. Fuck my life, etc. Wish me luck!

Comic lulz/minor ranting

So…I’ve recently been reading some of Y: The Last Man recently. While flipping through the pages, I found something quite hilarious and felt the need to share it with you! WARNING: Republicans will likely not find this image funny, so you might as well just skip the rest of this post…

Notice: No copyright infringement intended. I don’t own the rights to the comic. Y The Last Man is written/drawn by Brian K. Vaughan and Pia Guerra and published by Vertigo. I just want to show the picture. No money has been obtained from the showing of this picture, or anything like that. If the owners want me to take it down, please contact me, and I will do so, although do keep in mind that it’s free advertising for your comic, and it’s only part of a single page out of a really long comic. Etc etc etc.

"But who the hell is shooting at us, terrorists?" "Worse...republicans!"

Hahahaha. I don’t think republicans are “worse than terrorists”, but as soon as I saw it I laughed and thought about posting it to the blog. Sorry to my republican friends, but I just found this hilarious. Probably because before I came strange “crazy radical” independant Momo, I was crazy democrat Momo, and still have quite a few leanings that way. Plus the current crop of republicans have been scaring the bejesus out of me. If you’re going to cut things, cut the useless stuff that no one likes, instead of the stuff people actually use. I’ll get to this in another post, because I feel my rage building about the particular subject that I’m thinking of and I’m going to need to let it out somewhere….

But yeah. I’m not too fond of the democrats, but I really don’t like the republicans.

Life is mostly okay. School started up last week, however, due to two inconvenient snow days, one of them being on the first day of classes, all the stuff is not yet sorted out. Alas. Sadly, it’s mostly the school taking forever to take care of things. Even if it takes them past add/drop period to fix everything, I’ll still be able to attend, I think, I’ll just need to pay $10 to register…but I’m getting ahead of myself. I’ll write more about that tomorrow, during my break in classes, after I get an update from financial aid and find out if I get to add my senior seminar…

To hold you over until then, however, I’ve got some silliness for you.

Tonight, boyfriend and I started playing Ultima IX. It’s a game from…1999? According to wikipedia, at least. I was like…10 0r 11 at the time it came out, which amuses me greatly to think about.

Anyways, at the beginning, there are these crazy hard wolves. I don’t know why, but they just kept wrecking us. We’re talking multiple times killing us (mostly due to boyfriend not wanting to heal, but I digress. Even without that, each hit took away a lot more health than we expected.) One attacked us unexpectedly, while we had low health, so we ran into a nearby pool to try to get away from us. I guess the game glitched, or wolves are magic in Brittania, because it WALKED OUT ONTO THE WATER AFTER US.

We got to the other side of the pool, then circled around. The wolf was still on the water. I think it must have gotten stuck there, because it was staring right at us but not attacking. We thought this was strange, so we took a screen shot…

You can clearly see the wolf is on the water. WWWOOOLLLVVVEEESSS on the WAAAATTTEEERRRR ran through my head when I first thought of it (click here if you miss the reference)

There’s a king in the game called Lord British. (Hahaha, Lord British, King of Brittania….sorry, easily amused) Apparently, you can kill him in each game, as a bit of an easter egg. At least, that’s what boyfriend told me. This game? Poison bread. Don’t believe me? Here, have a video…(not taken by me, found on youtube, because I’m too lazy to set up capability to do it myself…)…enjoy!

Well, I’m off to play more games, and relax before school tomorrow. Off to campus to -hopefully- add a psych senior seminar at 10, then two other classes tomorrow. Wish me luck, will update again tomorrow! Wish me luck!

Internet Roundup

So, I’m still having some school problems, so for this week, WTF Wednesday and FTW Friday are gonna be combined together…

Link 1

Jusin Beiber slowed down by 800%. It’s a 30-something minute track of awesomesauce. I seriously burned this to a CD and put it into my rotation of night CDs (I fall asleep better listening to music, so I have a number of sleepytime music). Not because it’s boring, but because it’s calm and soothing, and, most importantly…AWESOME!

Link 2

A Panera where the price is only suggested…you pay what you want. And 50-90% pay either at or higher than the suggested price. Really cool idea, I think, especially with “the economy” being the way that it is…

Link 3

I’ll let the article speak….

Harvard University researchers have found that, in both laboratory and mouse studies, delta-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) cuts tumor growth in half in common lung cancer while impeding the cancer’s ability to spread.

The compound “seems to have a suppressive effect on certain lines of cancer cells,” explained Dr. Len Horovitz, a pulmonary specialist at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City.

According to the researchers, THC fights lung cancer by curbing epidermal growth factor (EGF), a molecule that promotes the growth and spread of particularly aggressive non-small cell lung cancers.

See? It helps cure cancer. LUNG cancer.Even inhaling it’s hot smoke is beneficial to you…

Link 4

They found a way to use an organic dye to make any piece of glass into a solar panel…awesome ^_^

Link 5 (NSFW, or I’d post a pic of it..)

It’s a necklace with a vagina charm. This one I think is pretty awesome. I like the colors, and the way they look together. Very 90’s, but judging by the title, that was the point. If it still is for sale when I have enough money (sorta unemployed at the moment..) I think I’ll buy it…

Link 6

Apparently, the blue dye from M&M’s can help treat spinal injuries…and cute blue mice…

Link 7

Passive aggressive apology letters to BP. Brilliant! I was in stitches.

Link 8

This is a brilliant invention. It could save you so much money on soda…over time, anyways. I drink a lot of soda, so it would work for me.

Link 9:

Pokemon, let me show you them!

If you don’t know why this is awesome…..go find a first gen Pokemon game. >_<

Link 10

Apparently, a prison in the US is going to be using a “laser pain ray” to try to control the inmates…the part that really gets me tho is this quote from the article:

Prison officers have even tested the non-lethal weapon on themselves and say it is excruciatingly painful.

Wow, this REALLY REALLY hurts….let’s go use it on other people! >_<

Link 11:

…wow….

And with that, I bid thee all adieu!

Win quote!

I do not know how true this is, since a friend posted it as his facebook status, but I thought it was so epic I had to share..

I met this guy and I asked him, ‘You wanna do some coke?’ He goes, ‘No, no, no.’ I’m whacking this stuff up my nose… I say, ‘What do you do?’ He says ‘I work for the government.’ Uh…what do you do with the government?’ ‘I work for the drug squad.’ I sez, ‘You’re fucking joking.’ He shows me his badge. I fuckin’ flipped…He says, ‘oh you’re all right. I’m the guy who got you the coke.’”- Ozzy Osbourne

Ah, I knew there was a reason why I ♥ Ozzy. 😉

FTW FRIDAY

FTW Friday, people-changing-clocks-makes-me-miss-anarchy-class-chat-edition!

(I woke up, looked at the clock, it said 10, so I figured, hey, can’t actually be 10, that clock is an hour fast…and then it turns out someone had fixed it >_<

First of, Anti-drug ftw!

I haven’t watched this yet (my boyfriend and I wanna watch it together, so I need to wait for him) but I’ve scrolled through it a bit and…boy is it lulzy-looking.

From Wikipedia:

Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue is an animated drug prevention television special starring many of the popular cartoon characters from American Saturday morning television. Financed by McDonald’s, the special was originally simulcast on April 21, 1990 on all three major American television networks: ABC, NBC, and CBS, most independent stations, as well as cable networks Nickelodeon and USA Network. McDonald’s also distributed a VHS home video edition of the special, produced by Buena Vista Home Entertainment, which opened with an introduction from then-President George H. W. Bush, and First Lady Barbara Bush.

With a description like that, how could this not be so-terrible-it’s-awesomesauce?

Next: Baby win!

Link

I get what she’s trying to do. Cool.

Next: Game win!

Link

I might have posted this before, but regardless, it’s pretty awesome.  Try it in night mode for an extra challange 🙂

Lastly: Save the animals win!

Link

From their website:

50% of women do not leave abusive situations for fear her pet will be injured or killed. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (www.ncadv.org), there were 113,123 reported cases of domestic violence and 180 domestic-violence related homicides in Florida in 2008. Women and children should not have to leave their pet(s) behind.
The goal of Animal Safehouse is to remove this barrier by caring for pets while owners are in transition. Our objective is to form a network of foster families to provide homes for pets of domestic violence survivors until they can be reunited in a safe living environment. We provide all food, supplies, vet care, and other essentials throughout their stay with us. We also help women reunite with their animals post-shelter by assisting with pet deposits and transport (we even shipped a dog to Oregon once).

I think this is a great idea. Domestic violence victims have enough trouble leaving abusive situations, they shouldn’t have to worry about their pets getting hurt/killed as well. This is the first I’ve heard of such a place, and I heartily support it! I wish I wasn’t a poor college student, or I’d donate some moneez…

Anyways, lovelies, I must be going. Got some work I need to get done tonight. Ta! ♥

WTF WEDNESDAY

WTF WEDNESDAY, Holy-shit-am-I-actually-on-time edition!

First, gross wtf!

Link

I purchased a Happy Meal, not to eat, but to observe and blog about. Yes, I bought a Happy Meal and then placed it on my office shelf, right behind me and my computer. It sat on my shelf for a year as a silent witness to our fast food industry.

Spoiler alert: It doesn’t really change all that much. It gets a bit dried out, but doesn’t smell bad or anything. Gross! I can’t believe we put that shit into our bodies! Ugh!

Next, Texas WTF (although I’m beginning to feel like that’s me being redundant at this point)

Link

I’m gonna paraphrase here, and list the bolded proposed changes. The supposed “reasoning” (if you can call it that) and a few more minor points at the link:

– A greater emphasis on “the conservative resurgence of the 1980s and 1990s.”

– A reduced scope for Latino history and culture.

– Changes in specific terminology.

– A more positive portrayal of Cold War anticommunism.

– Language that qualifies the legacy of 1960s liberalism.

– Thomas Jefferson no longer included among writers influencing the nation’s intellectual origins.

– Excision of recent third-party presidential candidates Ralph Nader (from the left) and Ross Perot (from the centrist Reform Party).

– A recommendation to include country and western music among the nation’s important cultural movements.

These changes would affect up to 80% of the textbooks sold across the country. You see, Texas is big. It has a lot of people in it. Textbook companies knows that more people = more textbooks, more textbooks = more money…**sigh** Come on Cali, do some crazy changes the other way! Textbook companies won’t know what to do, and they’ll stay the way they are, or something like that. Just…ugh! If the dominant textbooks are changed in that manner…. THEY WANT TO LEAVE OUT JEFFERSON FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! WTF?!?!

Next, prostitution WTF:

Link

I really just posted this for the second to last line:

A prostitute is more likely to have sex with a police officer than to get officially arrested by one.

**gigglesnort**

Next; Border WTF!

Link

The situation came to a head recently when a local man was arrested while walking down a street he said that he has walked down for years without a problem.”I walked over to Canada on a Saturday night around quarter to nine to get a pizza,” Buzz Roy explained. Roy lives and works in Derby Line. He walked down Church Street to the nearest pizza shop, which happens to be in Canada, and said that to his surprise he was stopped by state police and told that crossing on Church Street is illegal.

**sighs** It’s illegal to walk down the street to get a pizza because of an imaginary line on a piece of paper. Great.

With 1 minute to spare! Enjoy!

BTW, Prince is disgusted with your shenanigans! (Edit: Apparently wordpress and gifs don’t always play nice. If it doesn’t move for you, click on it!)

So, Dr. Q and I have been playing Majora’s Mask recently, and we’ve found some pretty awesome screenshots. Here’s some of the more funny ones:

deku shrub private propertyEven in video games, they won’t let you abuse private property…except they’ll let you into people’s houses and allow you to break their vases and steal their money and other various objects you might want to use **giggle** The only reason why this was different, I think, was so that they could throw in something to do (fetch quest, fetch quest, lalalalalala)

mailman scheduleEven in video games, bureaucrats are still silly and stupid. “Maybe I can schedule fleeing between my 3 pm meeting and 4 pm delivery…” **giggle**

mailman freeThe mayor’s wife set him free, so he could flee! See how much happier being your own boss can make you?

keaton trainingAh, keaton, how condescending you are when I answer your questions wrong :-p

dicksThey’re kinda condescending in general, actually. “You don’t get it, but you might as well do it anyways. These are grown up matters!”

Exhibit 2Exhibit 2

Bunny hoodThis was just too lulzy to pass up. We had to! I think one of the other screens here was about “grown up matters” or it not making much sense to you, funnily enough, but the screen grab didn’t work. Oh wells.

Oh, drama in the game! This shit is INTENSE!

“You are our master!”…you taught them a dance, so they bow to you, and you’re they’re “master”.  **sighs and facepalms**

This made me sad. 😦 This happens after you steal his room, so he can’t use it. Apparently, you both have the same name, so it’s not that hard to do, but it still made me feel guilty…

Aw, they is cute and lovey!This made me happy though. Cute love-y sea horses!

Maybe there will be more as we continue playing. I just wanted to dump these, for teh lulz

Also, people should join this facebook group I found, because it’s fucking awesome:

I hate it when the moon falls down, destroying the Earth 😦